myob or not

I have been awake a lot the last two nights worrying over my friend. She's being scammed for the last three months. 

She has to know down deep it's not real as she's not a stupid person. She owns a business, still at age 77. Looks like she's in her 50s, very active and healthy. In her past career worked in an attorney's office. 

People can say, "I would never fall for it" but scammers are extremely good at what they do and they groom and brainwash you.

They are isolating her now. I am the only one who knows and they have had her delete all social media except the one they contact her on. 

When we met for lunch on Tuesday, she had been texting with him. So much she was late. This is a woman who is 30 minutes early for everything. 

She came in to the diner talking about how she had been sitting on her couch crying. I thought she was going to say she had finally accepted she was being scammed again, but, no, it was because he was getting her a new car and villa in Italy. Sigh.

She said it was finally "her time" as she took care of her mother and then husband, who both had dementia.  

I felt ill and I told her it was a scam. I've told her at least 20 times it is a network of scammers. Everything I bring up, she has an excuse or "answer" to "explain." 

They have her hooked deep. It all started out that she had "won" a car and had to pay to have it shipped. 

She figured it out and went to the bank and police. 

She didn't get all her money back, but some. She got a new debit card and went online and told everyone it was a scam.

She took two days telling everyone, who she felt might be falling for it, that it was a scam.

Naturally, scammer messaged her. 

They started with a new story. They were "sister" of a famous rich person and FBI/CSI was helping because he was being scammed all the time. Give her all the information, kindly, and not only will she help get her  money back, she will connect her with that "secret squirrel" famous guy, since she's a fan. 

Next, "he" reached out, they began chatting constantly and he told her of the woes of being rich and famous.

He don't even like being rich and famous. He just wants to help the world poor and sets my friend up with helping them as well. He's very wealthy, but he and her are working together to help humanity. She's a very good person and donates. 

Next, he suggests readings with tarot cards, and so on. Somehow he's not able to pay for readings, so she does and finds out they were soulmates in the past, present and future. He convinces her the world is ending in 2 years anyway, so no big deal about money being needed to live out the rest of her days.

The scammers bombard her with texts daily. Both "secret squirrel famous man" and "sister." Even the occasional FBI agent.

Lots of grooming, romance, impersonation and God/spirit talk. Also getting details about her and family/friends down to needing pics of me and her location at all times. Including our location for lunch on Tuesday. 

He tells her he cannot speak on the phone because his calls are being traced. He convinces her to move closer to him (not really where he is but the big lie/fabricated location) he tells her how much he has been helped by her because she is extremely positive and he has been so negative his whole life until now.

He starts telling her he is her husband and will always do everything for her.

He, somehow, has convinced her that they met one time in person already to make it more 'legit.'

I know they have not met in person. Maybe it's more of "past life talk" but I think it's more: "Remember you were at the mall that one day in 1990??? We saw each other THAT day. What a coincidence!"

He supposedly has helped her get rid of all the real scammers.  She's deleted all apps except the ones he helped her step by step add to her phone. He has told her she must not tell anyone they are in a relationship. She broke her promise and told the "secret" to me.

I think he's even convinced her to close her business, as she's given me a lot of the product. During lunch she even said I would have first pick at all she has because she won't move it with her in February. It makes me so sad. Also, I need none of it in a near 100 year old tiny cottage.

I told her again, it's a scam. I gave her examples of all of this happening to other people, how I get daily messages that are scams, what types of things that they "offer." 

When I tell her this is a scam, you can tell she immediately puts a wall up, shuts down and stops listening.  When she's talking about "him" she glows! 

She's as giddy as a schoolgirl, has taken to dressing super saucy, lots of make up, etc. Shes always been really put together, but now, even more so. 

I have been so upset and thinking I haven't done enough to stop this, that people close to me are more worried for me than her. I have a huge empathy gene. 

There are some videos online from news agencies who talk to victims of impersonation or romance scams, I have nearly sent her six times today. I haven't because even the newscasters and journalists laugh and joke and comments, "How could you be so stupid?" abound. If I sent any of those to her she'd never speak to me again. 

So, mind my own business, or not? She's been pretty close to me since her husband died and even closer since the pandemic and lock down. We continued seeing each other masked and outside. No other friends did I do that with, even when they 'demanded.'

I've only went in to a restaurant twice in almost three years and both times were with her. I feel like a daughter to her. 

She only has one half brother and they aren't getting along now, partially because he hid her phone from her for 2 days at Thanksgiving. 

I have to stop worrying about her so much. She's way past 3 times 7 and it's her money.

Years ago I was in a 12 step type group and my sponsor/mentor used to respond to me with me a kind of funny question. She'd ask me, "If all goes South, could you live under a bridge in your underwear?" I would laugh and respond, "Maybe  I could live in my car in my underwear, but not under a bridge." 

If all goes south with my friend, I know she could make it. I cannot control her or the situation and I am definitely not smarter than those damn scammers! Let the Universe unfold as it may. 

My friend texted me today, "God watches over me." I wanted to respond, "Hope so," or "God gave you five senses though." But, I did not respond to that text message.